Mr Chandhru Palmanavan and Ms Shamini Chandhru got married in 2001 when the term “DINK” was a concept unknown to most.
DINK is the abbreviation for “Dual Income, No Kids”, a term which originated in the 1980s to describe couples who consciously decide not to have kids, and where both husband and wife hold down full-time jobs.
These couples are different from those who are unable to conceive or are looking to adopt as they choose not to have children despite having the means to do so.
It’s a term Mr Chandhru, 53, and Ms Shamini, 46, heard of only recently.
A poll conducted by the Institute of Policy Studies’ (IPS) earlier this year found that young people are less likely to think it is necessary to marry and have children.
About 72 per cent of those aged 21 to 34 felt it was not necessary to have children in a marriage, compared with 63 per cent in the 35 to 49 range and 49 per cent in the 50-64 range.
“I have been to many parts of the world thanks to my former job (cabin crew with Singapore Airlines) and I have seen how overpopulated the world is. So I’ve never had the desire to have kids, and always saw making this choice for the greater good,” said Mr Chandhru, a customer experience manager at Delta Airlines.
“During the first five years of our marriage, I would ask Shamini every year on our wedding anniversary if she wanted to have kids. She kept saying no, so we were always on the same frequency.”
Ms Shamini, a SkillsFuture trainer and an avid traveller, said she often notices how her friends who have kids struggle to find the time or money to travel.
“There are many reasons why I don’t want to have kids, but an important one, apart from my passion for travelling, was the fact that I was working in a special needs school when I got married,” she explained.
“Having my own kids would mean less time and attention for my kids in school and I did not want to put myself in that position.
“And when my motherly instincts kick in, I’ll usually just dote on my nieces and nephews before returning them to their parents when they get too tough to handle.”
The couple, who live in a five-room flat in Pasir Ris, earn a combined monthly income of more than $10,000 and travel three to six times annually.
Ms Shamini said she used to get paid more when she was an actress on Vasantham.
“Our combined annual income used to be more than $15,000 when we were younger and in our former jobs, but now, we have decided to relax a bit more.”
When asked what their parents thought of their decision not to have children, Ms Shamini said her parents support her decisions no matter what, while Mr Chandru pointed out that his dad was a science teacher, and so was “pragmatic and understanding” about the issue.
Mr Chandhru said that without kids, he has been able to set aside a room in his flat as his “man cave”, where he spends his time watching movies and storing his collectibles.
“Not having kids has given us more freedom to spend our money on things we like and that is what we cherish the most,” he said. “When you don’t have kids you get to be the kids.”
To fill their paternal and maternal voids, the couple adopted a dog about 15 years ago. Sadly, Mylo died in 2018. The couple then adopted another dog, Rainbow, two years later.
“For the 14 and a half years Mylo was with us, it was magical. He truly was a kid to us,” said Ms Shamini.
“As much as having a furkid is also an expensive affair, at least it does not talk back,” she added with a laugh.
