Famous American writer and lecturer Dale Carnegie (1888 – 1955) wrote: “A person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.”
This astute observation appeared in his 1936 bestseller How to Win Friends And Influence People.
So, getting names right is absolutely critical. However, addressing people correctly in Singapore can sometimes be tricky for foreigners.
With Chinese names, confusion sets in because the Chinese custom is to put the family name first, which is the opposite of the standard practice in European and many other cultures. In the name Tan Chee Wah, Tan is the family or surname and Chee Wah is the given name.
To further complicate matters, surnames are completely missing among Malays and Indians who adopt patronymic naming customs.
For Malay men, the patronym consists of the title “bin” (from the Arabic word meaning “son of”) followed by his father’s given name.
If Ahmad bin Ismail has a son called Osman, the child would be named Osman bin Ahmad. For a daughter, the patronym is “binti”, such as in Aisyah binti Ahmad.
These days, it is common for many Malays to drop the patronymic, so Ahmad’s children may be known as Osman Ahmad or Aisyah Ahmad.
So. always use the first name and never the second.
Another feature in Malay names, which is now common, is the existence of another personal name. This often entails the use of popular Muslim names, like Muhammad for men and Nur or Siti for women.
So the end-result could be Muhammad Osman bin Ahmad or Nur Aisyah binti Ahmad.
Another popular double name for men is Abdul. Abdul means “servant of” in Arabic and must be followed by one of the names of Allah in the Quran; for example, Abdul Haqq means “Servant of the Truth”.
Do note that Muhammad could be written as Muhd, or Mohd, and Abdul as Abd.
Then, traditionally, a Chinese, Malay and Indian married woman does not change her name.
To play it safe, if you meet a Doreen Tan Su Lin, refer to her as Ms Tan or better still Ms Doreen.
If he is Abdul Haqq bin Sulaiman, then address him as Mr Abdul Haqq or Mr Haqq.
And if he’s Subramanian Balachandran, you are fine calling him Mr Subramanian.
Perhaps later on, you can shorten it to Mr Subra. Do see how it pans out first.
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15 Mar 2024 13:32
