Since the 2013 National Day, many Singaporeans have been singing: “One people, one nation, one Singapore. That’s the way we will be forever more.”
Well, take this with a pinch of salt, as there are several types of Singaporeans.
Let’s start with the famous “kiasu (Hokkien for fear of missing out) brigade”. They are willing to queue overnight for Hello Kitty toys or Taylor Swift concert tickets.
“Kiasuism” is now considered a national trait but there are pockets of other personalities.
Perhaps the largest group after the kiasu brigade is the “Foodies R Us” – they gush about the best outlet, often in a very obscure part of Singapore, at the mention of a dish.
Just nod your head. Contradicting them will lead to a lengthy discussion about ingredients and recipes.
There’s the “blur type”, who are often referred to as sotong (Malay for squid and slang for bewildered). They have their heads buried so deep in the sand that when they hear of long queues for Taylor Swift shows, they wonder why the people don’t just buy ready-made clothes at the nearest department store.
Perhaps, the most annoying – at least in my book – is the “patriotic type”. They sincerely believe everything in Singapore is simply the best.
I used to know someone in this group. Once, when a foreigner commented that Singapore was very humid, that someone suggested rather angrily that the foreigner return to her home country.
Another group that can get on your nerves comprise the “complainers”. They always come up with something negative to say.
For example, if they won $10,000 in the lottery, they would complain about having to go to the Singapore Pools office in Middle Road to collect their winnings.
Many of these complainers have evolved into netizens.
Then, there are the “taiji masters”.
Taiji is an ancient Chinese discipline of meditative movements that look like blocking or deflecting something. Taiji masters are known to divert their duties to their colleagues.
Then there are the perpetual worriers, known locally as kan cheong (Cantonese and Hokkien for nervous, harried or uptight). The littlest issue will have them creating a hue and cry.
Their opposites are the “jokers”, who will inject humour into almost everything, no matter how inappropriate. They can’t help themselves, it’s in their DNA.
The good part is that you can’t remain angry with them for long.
